Saturday, 23 August 2014

Parting Ways
August 23, 2014

Parting Ways

After my previous post I woke up the next day I woke up feeling a lot more at ease with myself but also drained and exhausted after what seemed like a unbearably long day. After every bad day I always picture the next day as an opportunity for a fresh start. The only thing stopping me from having a good day is all within my capability.

So one thing in particular put me in a really positive frame of mind yesterday. I live in a city in England at the moment, I'm sure you all know it. It's Liverpool, home to the football team and the Beatles. For the past month or so they've had pianos spotted around town and people are welcome to sit down and play whenever they like. So on my way to work I see this middle-aged man playing a beautiful piece on a piano smiling away in a blissful escape with closed eyes. He opens his eyes still grinning and I look at him, when he makes eye contact we both smile a each other. He has no reason to smile at me and yet he did, making me feel less alone. Such a simple gesture can mean a lot to someone even when you don't expect it. Do me a favour, next time you see someone who looks they might having a rough day try it out. You could make their worst day into something more special.
Radiate positive vibes and it's contagious, infect people with your kindness.

 Today had some good and some bad moments. Waking up to a reply to a text from my old friend had hurt me. Someone I had considered a very good friend, who had been there for me when nobody else was, had lashed out at me for saying I miss him and was hoping he'd come visit me like he said. Everyone has their own issues in life but we've clearly drifted apart over their years as I left London to go to university. It made me frustrated that I was always making the effort to talk to him, an a common issue amongst people. Maintaing long distance friendships can be hard. He said he wanted me to treat him like everyone else and that I was clinging onto this permanent label of best friends which isn't permanent. I guess I viewed him so highly as a friend that I would always be loyal to him. It's a shame but sometimes people part ways. I've clearly changed so much within the past few years and as has he, maybe now we were just not compatible as friends anymore. It was a difficult step to make, to acknowledge and express my feelings and still lose something, but don't underestimate closure. Closure provides relief and there's always some background stresses than can be resolved when approached correctly.

You need to close old doors to open new ones sometimes. I may have lost someone I love but leaves a new space for someone else. I decided to transfer my disappointment into positive energy, and not let myself get too affected by it. After all I wasn't gaining anything from the friendship anymore, some people are meant to stay in your life and others touch you for a while and do their part before leaving.  I'm one of those people that feel pleasure from making others happy so to make myself feel better what's better than rewarding and acknowledging your true and current friends. So on the way back from my therapy with my psychologist I thought I'd try my best to turn a bad day into a good one. Buying lunch and flowers for my girlfriend and showering her with affection. Let the people that love you know that you appreciate them. As I learnt, don't take it for granted because you can never know when the you may part ways.

Francis

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